Undefiled Christian Marriage Bed

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christian marriage bed



Is Your Christian Marriage Bed Undefiled?


An undefiled Christian marriage bed. Hmmm…Does that mean anything is permissible in your bedroom?


Many people believe that where sex is concerned, anything is acceptable in marriage as long as both the husband and the wife agree to it. That includes threesomes, open marriages, sexual bondage, and whatever else you can imagine.


Today we are going to take a look at Hebrews 13:4 in order to gain a better understanding.  Here’s the text:


“Marriage is honorable among all, and the marriage bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.” Hebrews 13:4 NKJV


The reason the above text is often misquoted is because people have focused on one small portion of the scripture, “the marriage bed undefiled”. The rest of the text has been ignored.


It is not wise to extract only a portion of a scripture without looking at the whole.


A good rule to use when you study the Bible is to look a the scriptures before the text, as well as those scriptures following the text.  You should also utilize a concordance, and read the same text in other translations whenever possible.


But don’t worry, we won’t do all of that today.


To avoid turning this into a full blown Bible study, and risk boring you, we’ll keep this simple.


In our discussion of the undefiled Christian marriage bed, let’s take a quick look at three different translations of the same scripture:


Version#1 NKJV

“Marriage is honorable among all, and the marriage bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge.”

Version#2 TNIV
“Marriage should be kept honorable by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.”

Version#3 The Message
“Honor marriage, and guard the sacredness of sexual intimacy between wife and husband. God draws a firm line against casual and illicit sex.”

Christian Marriage Bed Cont’d

When you read the text in other translations it becomes clearer, doesn’t it?


The writer is warning married believers to respect the marriage covenant by guarding themselves from sexual sins.


Sexual immorality, as stated in the TNIV would include adultery, homosexuality, and beastiality to name a few. Basically, it’s sex with anyone other than your spouse.


Nowhere in the text does it give couples a license to do whatever they want to do in the bedroom. In fact, it actually says the opposite.


So, based on the interpretation of the scripture, we want to ask you a question; is a threesome okay for married couples? You should have said “no” because a threesome would require you to have sex with someone other than your spouse — That’s called adultery.


What about sex toys and other sexual aids? This is where you have to use Godly wisdom. Remember, sex between husband and wife should always be honorable.


So, if what you’re doing causes either of you to feel pain, disrespected, or shameful, then you shouldn’t do it. Intimacy between husband and wife is a sacred gift that should never evoke feelings of guilt, shame, or disrespect.


When a husband and wife make love they should always have the physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being of the other person in mind.


***Important Note***

If you become sexually aroused when you’re disrespected, put to shame, or belittled; if it turns you on to see your spouse engaging in sex with someone else — something’s wrong with that. You should begin seeking deliverance through prayer because that, my friend, is not of God.


Jesus came to set you free! His desire is that you would be full of joy and peace, not guilt or shame caused by sexual perversion.


christian marriage bed sex in the bible



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