Christian Marriage Counseling
How Do You Know it's Time?

Christian marriage counseling is not the job of your children, family, or best friend. But sadly, these are the people who will find themselves stuck in the middle if you choose not to seek professional help. How do you know when it's time to see a counselor? Simply put, when all of your efforts to resolve your marriage issues have failed.

Does the Thought of Marriage Counseling Intimidate You?

Well, you're not alone. For many couples, the idea of sharing intimate details of their lives with a complete stranger is frightening. While other couples doubt the effectiveness of counseling altogether. They refuse help because of scepticism and one looming question, does marriage counseling really work?

But a better question is this: If what you are doing now is not working, then why not try marriage counseling?

My first marriage was dysfunctional, it displayed many signs of marriage problems. We desperately needed marriage counseling but my ex-husband refused to go "talk to a stranger." I guess he figured we could work out our problems on our own. Of course, that didn't happen.

There's no question that letting down your guard and becoming vulnerable with someone you hardly know can illicit feelings of anxiety but like most things in life, counseling is not as bad as you may be imagining.

In fact, Michael and I believe it's one of the best decisions you and your spouse can make for your marriage and your children. Click here to get helpful marriage counseling tips that will assist you during therapy.

The Benefits of Marriage Counseling

A Christian counselor can assist you and your spouse with developing a marriage that is as God intended. Christian based counseling is empathic, authentic, and spiritual in nature. It will cause the two of you to grow closer together as well as closer to the Lord.

If you are concerned about the qualifications of a Christian marriage counselor, rest easy. Christian counselors receive similiar training as secular counselors such as: listening to couples, assisting in identifiying blind spots, providing different perspectives, and giving encouragement.

Christian marriage counseling is synonymous with Biblical marriage counseling and thus your counselor will likely utilize Scripture and prayer to assist with gaining insight. Also, if you choose a good counselor, you should expect him or her to assign homework to be completed by you and your spouse between sessions.

You can also rest in the knowledge that a Christian counselor will not push you or your spouse into anything you are not ready for. Just as Christ waits on you, your Christian counselor will gently guide the two of you to the place of change and growth.

From that point, it is up to the two of you to do the necessary work to have a successful marriage. Again, Christian marriage counseling is helpful but the counselor is not responsible for the outcome of your marriage -- you are.

It is YOUR marriage and so you and your spouse must take full responsibility for the success or failure of it. Start by letting go of your inhibitions concerning counseling. Realize that intervention from a qualified third party is 100% worth it if it can save your marriage.

What if My Spouse Refuses to See a Professional Counselor?

Don't panic, there are other options available to you. If you are members of a church, you can seek couples counseling from your pastor or another minister. Some couples have reported that talking to their pastors didn't help their situation, while others found it was just what they needed.

Your other option is a form of "self-help." Go with your spouse to a local bookstore and research marriage counseling books together. You will find that there are plenty of quality "self-help" marriage books out there that can provide you with the guidance you need. However, there are just as many books written by unqualified individuals, so use caution.