Husband Cheated on Me Twice

Question: Husband Cheated on Me Twice. Ok here it is. My husband and I married in 2009. Been together for 15 years. He first cheated on me back in 2003. I felt my love was strong enough to stay with him. He had sexual contact with this girl for about 3 months. Until I found out myself. We went to therapy and things got better. Now its somewhat happened again. The password got changed from our att.com account and I asked about it and he said that he didn't change it and then 2 days later he told he did. He's been texting and talking to a different girl but no sexual contact (that is what he said) The texting has been none stop for 3 weeks. He told me finally cause he felt sick about this. So right now I don't know what to do. Please help me. I can't go through this again. Thanks for your time.

Answer: With all due respect, you have to accept responsibility for your part in this. You said your husband cheated on you BEFORE you married him but you disregarded this and got married anyway because you loved him? One of the toughest lessons I had to learn in my life was, "When a person shows you who they are, believe them." That means, when people show you their true character by their behavior, accept it. Don't make excuses for them or live under the false pretense that your love can somehow change them -- accept it. Otherwise, what happens is that you end up paying for it later. Which is exactly where you are now. What should you do?


Simply put, you and your husband need marriage counseling. Even if he claims not to have had sex with these women, the fact that he is in communication with them is a problem that needs to be explored. It doesn't matter whether you receive counseling from your pastor or from a professional counselor. It only matters that the two of you commit to getting help soon.


Next, we want to ask if you guys are born again Christians? That is, have you prayed and accepted Christ into your hearts? If neither of you have done this, this should be your number one priority. Also, do you belong to a church? Are you attending Bible study? These are important questions because without Christ, you can't call your marriage a "Christian marriage".

If Christ has been missing in your marriage, we recommend you seek to change that right away. You see, your husband's problem is in his heart but only God has the power to change a person's heart.

So once again, we suggest counseling and giving your lives back to Christ.


We will be praying for your marriage. Thank you for visiting our website. May God bless you.



With Christ's Love,
Mike and Wanda