Marriage and Money Problems
Don't Really Exist

In fact, money, sex, and time are reported to be the top deal breakers in most marriages.

What was our problem? We never had enough money to do the things we desired.

Sometimes we barely had enough money to pay our bills, much less buy anything extra.

So then, why are we claiming marriage and money problems don't exist?

Not having enough money is clearly a "money problem", right?

Well, it is but at the same time it isn't.

How can it be both?

What we have discovered is that money problems are merely a symptom of a deeper problem.

So, the real problem is not money? No.

If you are struggling with marriage and money problems, it is most likely a result of the experiences you had growing up.

If you're anything like the majority of us, as a child, you probably were not taught how to manage money. This of course spills over into your adult decision making patterns.

Also, there are those who grew up very poor; their parents struggled to provide basic necessities.

These individuals sometimes grow up to be over spenders; compensating for an impoverished childhood.

What are Other Factors that Manifest
as Marriage and Money Problems?

Birth order may also play a part. Children who are born last or are the only child, tend to be selfish and less compromising.

While first born children tend to be real risk takers, and often very prideful.

All of these factors, believe it or not, have a huge impact on how you manage money as an adult.

According to Larry Burkett, your money management skills reveal the REAL you. Taking a few moments to analyze how the two of you spend money will reveal the following core values and attitudes:

• Selfish versus cooperation
• Pride versus humility
• Self control versus impulsiveness
• Trusting God versus rebellion or independence
• Greed versus generosity
• Sacrifice versus immediate need for self-gratification
• Your patterns of agreement
• Your priority of eternal versus earthly values
• Planning versus being disorganized

Tips for Your "Non-Existant"
Marriage and Money Problems

1. Have an Open and Honest Discussion with Your Spouse

Sit down together and discuss what it was like financially in your home growing up. Find out what childhood experiences may be directly impacting your inability to properly manage money. Talk about birth order and then do some research to learn more about how your birth order impacts your adulthood.

2. Expose Any Fears You May Have Concerning Money.

Remember, fear is not of God, See 2 Timothy 1:7. Fear is the opposite of faith and should not be employed when making any decision. Ask yourself, "what is motivating me, faith or fear?" Reject fear -- Embrace faith!

3. Love God not Money

This is not to say you shouldn't dream and strive to be financially secure. But there is a big difference in honest ambition and always seeking money. A love for money leads to greed, selfish ambition, and pride. "But seek ye first the kingdom of God and his rigtheousness, and all other things will be added unto you." Matthew 6:33

4. Practice Wisdom

If you can't afford it, don't buy it! This especially includes charging items to a credit card. Get in the habit of paying cash for everything. Over time, this little habit can wipe out your debt completely.

5. Save -- Save -- Save!

Never adopt the mindset "live for today". While we as Christians are not suppose to worry about our futures, we do have a responsibility to ourselves and to our children to plan for our futures by putting money aside.

5. Educate Yourself

Be intentional about learning all you can about money management. Do your own research or take a class!

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