My Husband Wants to Divorce Me

by Alisia Solorzano
(Fort Walton Florida USA)

Question: My husband wants to divorce me. Hi I have been married for 13 years to my husband and we have been through a lot he has cheated on me before but I have forgave him because I love him and moved on well now we have this problem again he met a girl a work and thinks he is in love with her and now tells me he wants a divorce well I don't I still love him I know this must sound stupid but I do and I don't know what to do i don't want to let him go. I have been praying and praying for God to make him see he is making a mistake but am I being wrong for acting this way I love him we have a 14 year old son that is his but I have raised since he was 8 months old and I love him like he is mine I just need advice please.

Answer: Hello Alisia. We are sorry to hear that your husband wants a divorce. And we know this may not be what you want to hear but you must let him go. If you look at the situation rationally, letting him go is the only logical thing that you can do. After all, you can't force him to stay with you and you can't change his heart. Only God can change his heart. So, let him go and trust God to take care of you. Focus your attention on the Lord and renew your relationship with Him. Allow God to love you and build your self-esteem back up. Next, seek out individual counseling for yourself and for your son. Pray not just for your husband to return but pray also for his salvation. Be encouraged and continue to trust God. Nothing is impossible for Him! He can even restore a relationship after divorce. Be blessed.


We love you and will be praying for you.


In Christ,
Mike and Wanda


UPDATE: We recently received a comment from another site visitor regarding our response to Alisia. Frankly, our response of "let him go" concerned her. As a result, we felt we should elaborate on our answer a bit more for the sake of all our readers.

Our response of "let him go" is based on two Biblical scriptures/principles. First, in the story of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:12), the father never attempts to convince his son to stay, he let his son go and trusts God to bring Him back. The Bible does not say that the father prayed for his son but we like to think that he did. The prayers of the righteous really do have much power, even when the one you love decides to leave.

As you know, the story of the Prodigal Son is really a tale about us and our Heavenly Father. When we rebel against Him and go our own way, He doesn't force us to stay with Him but at the same time, He NEVER gives up on us. He let's us go our way and waits for us to return. And most times, like the Prodigal Son, we return after we hit rock bottom.

Secondly, the Bible also tells us that if we are married to unbelievers that wish to leave, let them go. Why? because Christ is calling us to live in peace. Here is the exact Scripture: "But if those who are not believers decide to leave, let them. When this happens, the Christian man or woman is free. But God called us to live in peace " 1 (Corinthians 7:13-15). Again, this is only IF the spouse WANTS to leave.

The lesson in both of these Scriptures is that we are not to put ourselves in a place of opposition with others but in a position of trusting God to bring about reconciliation. Only God has the power to change a person's heart, not us.

Does "let go" mean "give up?" no. And we probably should have made that clear in our response -- "letting go" doesn't mean "give up".

So, NEVER give up! But do let go IF and only IF the person wants to leave. That is what the Bible tells us to do. Continue praying for their salvation as well as for the restoration of the marriage. Wait on them like God always does with us. And when they return, accept them back without condemnation like the father did the Prodigal Son.

God has the power to bring any marriage back together! Let me say that again, God has the power to bring any marriage back together! But we have to know when to take our hands off and let God be God. Is it easy? no. Does it hurt? yes. Is it scary? yes. But it's what the Word of God instructs us to do. We can't live in fear. We must be obedient to the Word of God and trust God fully.


Hopefully, all of you have a better understanding of our position according to Scripture.


With Christ's Love,
Mike and Wanda