Praying for God to open my wifes eyes

by Jim
(England)

Praying for God to open my wifes eyes: I had been with my now wife for a little over 6 years and we have been married for just over a year. We have 3 beautiful children, the eldest being 7. I've always been a believer (as in Jesus is the Son of God and died for my sins)but my wife isn't. That said, I have been horrendously backslidden for most of my relationship.

We've always had a very turbulent relationship. She had an affair when our second child was barely a toddler. I tried to forgive her but she left me to put the broken pieces of our relationship back together all on my own.

I have done some incredibly stupid things in my grief. Some things that will affect my life for ever from this point. I'm no angel. But i know I'm forgiven. However, 3 months ago I found that she was having yet another affair and had no intention of stopping this time. The guy she's involved with had just muscled in on a young, fragile family unit and I believe taken advantage of her weak nature. In the past two years I've lost my job (that was my fault), I've not lost my marriage, my house and I've had to stop seeing the children as the emotional trauma is too much for them and me. I've always been exceptionally close to our children and have been their primary care give for most of my relationship with my partner.

Of course I am praying constantly that god will open her eyes. She thinks she is doing nothing wrong and blames me. The guy won't even let me see my children at home. The home I got us. It all hurts so much. And she has used this whole affair to hurt me and humiliate me in the most dramatic fashion. I literally don't know how to stop grieving. I believe I mad a covenant with God when I married her. One which, divorced or not, I am determined to honor. I just want this guy gone so that I can see my kids and my wife and I can rebuild and do things properly. Even if we don't ever get back together.

Of course there are two sides to every story. But I have always loved her without condition. She has suffered with depression for much of our time together. And I've tried so hard to support her but faced a constant backlash from her emotions. I just can't handle the thought that, after all the hard work I put in that someone else will get the best of her. Something I always wanted.