Should I Get Married While in College?

by Kori

Question: Should I Get Married While in College? My boyfriend and I have been dating for a while now. I found out that he bought my engagement ring about nine months ago, he has my parents blessing but had a change of plans and now doesn't want to get engaged for a year or two. I would like to be married in a year or two. We are both in college and he doesn't think he would be fair to me to balance work, school and a wife. We already act like we are married and keep giving into sexual desires. I'm not anxious to be married for the sake of being married. But I need him and he is my spiritual leader. I keep praying about it and I still feel very strongly that I should be able to start planning my small wedding. I think that it is even more important for us to marry soon because we since the first time we gave into sexual temptation we have not been strong enough to stay pure for long. What advice can you give me?

Answer: Kori, the first thing we want to do is admonish you and your boyfriend to stop fornicating. Sex outside of marriage creates "soul ties" which are powerful bonds that are only meant to be shared by a husband and wife. This is likely the reason why you feel so pressed to be married and like you can't be without him.

So, first stop having sex. Next, don't be offended by this but...stop acting like you're married -- you're not. The truth is, your boyfriend is NOT your spiritual leader because he is not your husband. God is your spiritual head and your focus needs to be on Him at this point.

Kori, your boyfriend is using wisdom -- you should listen to him. There is no rush to get married or to plan a wedding. Focus on getting your education. Even more important, focus on renewing your relationship with Christ. If this is the man for you, you will be married to him when the time is right.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him and he will direct your path (Proverbs 3:5-6).


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With Christ's Love,
Mike and Wanda